Posts Tagged ‘stress’

My boyfriend makes more money than I do but seems to have less fun. He’s quite successful by any professional measure, but always being in overdrive seems to have quite a cost. He doesn’t make time for friends, has difficulty making weekend plans, and frequently falls asleep cuddled up with the computer. Am I right to be concerned, or is this the way most people succeed nowadays?

Dear Readers,

Anyone who loves someone who fits the above description is right to be concerned. Sadly, we are all more vulnerable to ‘work addiction’ nowadays. With the growing availability of technology that makes working 24/7 easier than ever and the widespread worry about holding onto jobs in a tight economy, it’s easy to forget how important it is to strike a healthy balance between work and play.

Ideally, technology can add more control to your worklife. But if you begin to feel manipulated by your Blackberry rather than the other way around, take stock of your priorities and try to reinforce the boundaries protecting your private life.

Many people can simply recalibrate. It’s those who don’t want to cut back on work because it seems more satisfying than their personal lives who can truly be called workaholics. Not sure? Take a look at Chained to the Desk (NYU Press, 2007), a guide for workaholics and their families by psychologist Bryan Robinson. A professor emeritus of counseling at the University of North Carolina, Robinson provides a 25-item checklist that can help you determine whether you have workaholic tendencies. Another checklist can be found on Workaholics Anonymous website.

Robinson’s checklist requires readers to rate themselves on a scale from 1 (never true) to 4 (always true) on a variety of items. Among them:

• I prefer to do most things rather than ask for help.
• I get impatient when I have to wait for someone else or when something takes too long.
• I get upset with myself for making even the smallest mistake.
• I ask the same question over again without realizing it, after I’ve already been given the answer once.

Depending on their scores, readers are rated as highly workaholic, mildly workaholic, or not at all workaholic. If you score high, your addiction can be as destructive as alcoholism, which means it also is likely to be adversely affecting your relationships with family members and friends. I would strongly suggest examining your relationship with work more closely with the help of a trained counselor.

One easy way to start thinking about adding more balance in your life, offered by Robinson, is to chart how much time you devote to self, family, play, and work as a percentage of your time and compare that with a more desired allocation for your future. The difference between the two gives you some idea of the scope of the change you seek.

Managers should be wary of the workaholics on their staff, says Rutgers University management professor Gayle Porter, who has conducted numerous studies on the differences between high performance workers and people suffering from work addiction. Despite the common view that workaholics are the most productive employees, she notes that workaholics are typically inefficient. “You can’t judge by face time,” she says. “Workaholics’ goals often are to take on more work than they can possibly handle and fill up as many hours as possible.” In his book, Robinson sums up the difference this way: “The healthy worker is in the office looking forward to being on the ski slopes; the workaholic is on the ski slopes thinking about the office.”

Workaholics who are employed in organizations that reward the round-the-clock effort they are trying to curtail may have to consider changing jobs, Porter says.

Taking action to address work addiction is guaranteed to pay off handsomely in the way that matters most: personally. As the highly driven Michael Jackson discerned in “Off the Wall”:

So tonight gotta leave that nine-to-five upon the shelf
And just enjoy yourself.

Dear Readers,
Are you lying awake at night worrying about your bank balance? Or the way your husband’s blood pressure rises in proportion to the number of layoffs in his company?

Obviously, you’re not alone.  The “Stress in America” survey conducted last year by the American Psychological Association (APA) found that almost 50 percent of Americans are increasingly stressed about their ability to provide for their family’s basic needs. Money and the economy were the top two stressors for 80 percent of Americans. Thirty-four percent experience chronic work stress. And that was last year. One can assume the numbers have climbed since then.

Women apparently feel it more than men. Slightly more female than male respondents reported stress about money (83 percent vs. 78 percent), housing costs (66 percent vs. 58 percent), and job stability (57 percent vs. 55 percent).

This is not good for our health. With money worries on the rise, stress-related symptoms are showing up more frequently. Americans who reported feeling irritable or angry jumped to 60 percent, up 10 percent from a year ago. Fifty-two percent of respondents said they lie awake at night, up from 48 percent in 2007. Headaches are also on the rise. How are people coping?

One of the most common outlets is food. Almost half of respondents reported overeating, eating junk food or skipping meals. Almost one in five reported turning to alcohol and smoking for stress relief. Repeated over a prolonged period, these bad habits can lead to serious illness.

Exercise, talking to spouses, friends and co-workers and seeking professional advice are more productive ways to manage stress. Exercise does double duty, relaxing and toning you at the same time. Confiding in others is another way to find relief. They can offer sympathy, perspective and even some creative ways for dealing with your challenges. Often people will respond to your vulnerability by sharing something personal about themselves. That you can help others even while you are feeling low is another morale booster.

The APA found that 58 percent of respondents would feel uncomfortable seeking professional advice to help manage stress. That’s unfortunate. If you are severely stressed and you have a job with benefits, find out if mental health services are covered. For a small co-payment you can get valuable professional advice. Trained therapists can help you strategize about the things you can control and the things you can’t.

Smart employers know that during tough economic periods sometimes the entire staff needs a boost. This sort of institutional wisdom is honored each year by the APA, which hands out the “Psychologically Healthy Workplace Awards.” The winners typically excel in several of the following five categories: employee involvement; health and safety; employee growth and development; work-life balance; and employee recognition. A 2008 winner, Georgia-based accounting firm Porter Keadle Moore, for instance, advertises its atmosphere to potential recruits as “characterized by autonomy, freedom and flexibility.”  The firm also offers “impromptu gatherings that provide much needed moments to relax and refresh as a group.”

Porter Keadle Moore even delivers organic fruit to its staff. It’s a small thing, but on a dark day, the sweetness of an orange or the brightness of a strawberry can lift spirits, if just for a few moments. Is it surprising that while 21 percent of workers at these award winners experience chronic work stress, their rate is significantly below the national average?
© CTW Features

Do you have questions about your job or the best way to handle a workplace challenge? Leslie Whitaker would like to hear from you. E-mail Leslie@ctwfeature.com and join the conversation at her Web site, www.lesliewhitaker.com.